Fancy Age of Marriage for girls

कहते हैं कि लड़कों को ऐसी बातों से फर्क नहीं पड़ता. अगर लड़का-लड़की को बराबर समझा जाता है तो लड़कियों को भी ऐसी-वैसी किसी बात से फर्क नहीं पड़ना चाहिये.

लेकिन ऐसा होता कहाँ है? लोग होने नहीं देते. मेरी जान पहचान में ही करीब 8-10 लड़कियां हैं जिनको उम्र भर के लिये फर्क पड़ गया है.

मेरे सबसे पहले पीजी में मेरी रूममेट एक पहाड़ी लड़की. बहुत स्वीट, सीधी और केयरिंग. मुझसे 4 साल बड़ी थी. उसको एयरपोर्ट पर एक बंदा मिला था. उसने मेरी रूममेट से काफी टाईम तक छुपाकर रखा कि वो शादीशुदा और एक बच्चे का बाप है. बात खुलने पर बोला कि अपनी वाइफ को तलाक दे देगा. 6-7 साल पुराने इस किस्से का सार ये है कि मेरी उस रूममेट ने अभी तक शादी नहीं की है और उसी पीजी में रह रही है.

मेरे पुराने प्रोजेक्ट की एक फ्रैंड. एक शहर से सारा बोरिया-बिस्तर समेटकर, जॉब छोड़कर नोयडा इसलिये आ गयी क्योंकि 3-4 साल के ब्रेकअप और शादी के झूठे वादे के बाद वो नयी शुरूआत करना चाहती थी. तब से 4-5 साल और बीत गये.

एक और दोस्त कॉलेज की कहानी लिये 9 साल से एक ऑन-एंड-ऑफ ऐब्यूज़िव रिलेशन में बंधी बैठी है. सब कुछ किस्मत और माँ बाप के भरोसे छोड़कर. यहाँ की असफलता उसकी जॉब पर कैंसर बनकर जम रही है.

एक फ्रैंड ने लव मैरिज की. तीसरे साल के अंदर तलाक हुआ और अब 2-3 साल से अकेली रह रही है. नयी जॉब और नये शहर से शुरूआत तो कर ली लेकिन कहाँ तक पहुँची ये पोल उसके करवाचौथ के व्रत के नाटक ने खोल दी.

एक कॉमन फ्रैंड की उम्र 40 को छू रही है लेकिन बोलती है कि उसको लड़कों पर भरोसा नहीं रहा इसलिये ऐसे ही रहेगी.

एक सीनियर हैं. दिल की बहुत अच्छी. होंगी 40 के आस-पास. उनके बॉयफ्रैंड ने बहुत साल पहले घरवालों की मर्ज़ी से कहीं और शादी कर ली थी. और मेरी सीनियर ने अभी तक शादी नहीं की.

और भी कई लड़कियाँ हैं जो लोगों की नज़र में शादी के लिये ओवर एज हो चुकी हैं. उनकी शादी की "फैंसी एज" निकल चुकी है. दिल की बहुत अच्छी हैं, हर हाल में हँसती-खुश रहती हैं, महीने के 60-70 हज़ार कमाती हैं तो क्या? हमारी नज़र में तो बूढ़ी हो गईं. उनका टाईम निकल गया.

इस संख्या के बदले में मैं ऐसे किसी लड़के को नहीं जानती जो सिर्फ किसी लड़की की वजह से बिना शादी किये बैठा हो. लड़कों को सच में ऐसी बातों से कोई फर्क नहीं पड़ता.

Come back to me....

Baby you used to be my sunshine; but I am not glowing anymore now.

Come back to me.

We were different from each other; but they say that opposites attract.

Come back to me.

We used to quarrel like siblings; but trust me, we are soul mates.

Come back to me.

I changed myself to suit you; but I always loved you the way you were.

Come back to me.

Baby you chose to live apart; but I wanted to be soaked in you forever.

Come back to me.

You turned to another way and never looked back; but I am still standing there for you.

Come back to me.

Your face flashes when I close my eyes; but you are not around when I open them.

Come back to me.

My fingers used to be locked in yours; but now these are crossed for you.

Come back to me.

We broke the rules to keep promises; but now you broke all the promises.

Come back to me.

You were always a part of me; but now my body is aching for your support.

Come back to me.

Baby I loved to be wrapped in your arms; but now need your shoulder to rest.

Come back to me. Come back to me....

Let’s not remain it I for India, Make it “We” for India.

I for India, India, our country. But why not I for Italy? How can we forget an Italian lady who has left her own country to eat-up ours and who has given a successor to the most corrupt and unfortunately most reputed political family of India?
H for heritage of thousand years old temples, buildings, and literature of India. But why not H for Hatred? Hate for old, hungry, handicapped, illiterate, underprivileged and poor people. And, for other religions too?
G for Glory. The brilliance, splendour, and grandeur of our history. But why not G for Godhra? As it also has a history associated with thousands of killings and arrests, and mass destruction of trust between Hindus and Muslims.
F for Freedom. But why not F for Fun, Fashion, or Facebook? Because we all spent Independence Day just as an extended weekend sitting in comfort of our homes doing status updates, posting pictures of Tricolour to show our patriotism or enjoying Independence Day sale offers or watching TV?
E for Election of an efficient Government which is expected to develop the nation. But why not E for Encroachment, not only on lands but also on people’s beliefs and faiths to make them terrorists, to make them hate and divide mother India?
D for Duty towards nation, devotion for our culture and values. But why not D for Deceit? Deceit with country and its citizens in the form of scams and scandals?
C for Constitutional rights. Do we remember even more than 2 or 3 of them? Then why don’t we follow C for Corruption? Because bribe, threats, dishonesty, have been more familiar terms.
B for Bravery of our soldiers. B for Brilliance of our scientists, doctors and engineers. But let’s learn B for Brain Drain; which is happening from more than last 15 years and we feel proud to share that our brother or sister has got a job abroad.
A for Anna Hazare. Padma Bhushan Anna Hazare, who has developed a village Ralegan Siddhi into India’s richest village, a man in his seventies, is now fighting to bring Jan Lokpal Bill against corruption. The amount of change it can bring is already evident by the huge support from all over the nation and at the same time huge opposition from all political parties.
It’s high time we have to stand up for the Nation. I request here to make the fullest of this opportunity for the betterment of our country. If it’s gone; our freedom is of no use.
I want to share an incident of 15th August 2007, first Independence Day after joining TCS; my father called up in the morning and asked, “How was the flag hoisting ceremony in your office?” “Papa there is just a holiday; we don’t hoist flag here.” I answered rapidly, but could not answer his next question, “You could have gone to some nearby school or college to attend that?”
Being the principal of a college my grandfather used to hoist flag for so many years; my father also attends it every year in his college. Then how could I break the ritual? Why don’t private companies make it compulsory to attend the ceremony otherwise the employee will be fired as they do in government offices?
Friends, we all have our kitty full of excuses for being neutral against corruption. “What this country has given me?” tops the list of them. Please think, “Have we ever given anything to this country?” And we will get the answer.

Let’s not remain it I for India, Make it “We” for India.

“Darsheel Safary now has new teeth and a girlfriend!” Wow….I too had some dental problem in childhood but no one made it news. Because, I had lived a normal childhood. Therefore, I had the liberty of keeping my secrets hidden.

Fame, money, rumours of a girlfriend is an overstatement for a child at an age of 13.  On the other side, children of that age lead a routine life revolving around school, cartoon films, Sunday outings, siblings, friends, homework, and may be a cute, school crush. Are we doing justice to these little souls who are shining stars of entertainment industry? And what about those children who can not make it to achieve stardom and surrender to dejection? Or those who become victim of physical assault because at that tender age; they do not know the difference between good and bad.

No, I am not against of entertainment industry; nor am I trying to discourage the talent. But the idea of execution needs an improvement so that parents do not impose their lost ambitions and aspirations on their child. The whole affair should be taken as a hobby instead of a trade-a means of income. Shuffling from one studio to other and skipping studies to do shifts is a violation of their basic right of Education. Did we ever think about the childhood of those children who portray an on-screen role of a child living a happy childhood? Do they get their share of content life in real? The answer is a harsh NO. Don’t they have a right to study, play, and indulge in all that happiness of childhood like everybody else does? Like we all did?

Not only Darsheel; Avika Gor and Avinash Mukherjee of Balika Badhu, Afsha Musani of SaReGaMaPa, Saloni of Comedy Circus, are few of them who don’t even realize what they have already lost behind the glitter of media.

Slumdog Millionaire, the movie, which bagged 8 Academy Awards i.e., Oscars, 7 BAFTA Awards, 5 Critic’s Choice Awards, and 4 Golden Globes, had three child artists Azharuddin Mohammed Ismail (Youngest Salim), Ayush Mahesh Khedekar (Youngest Jamal), and Rubiana Ali (Youngest Latika). After a few fashion shows and controversies we all forgot them. Did anyone think about their psychology while they had to return back to their below-ordinary life after all that attention, glamour and exposure?

Defeat is one thing which many of us can not accept. Let’s talk about the children who participate in reality talent shows and one child gets eliminated every week. Apart from entertainment had we ever thought about their state of mind and the permanent impact that they will have in their heart? Many of them even might leave that talent forever. How long they could endure when their friends bully them for that elimination? How would they feel after that extra attention has been snatched back from them all of a sudden?

Till now we were discussing about those stars only. Now let’s get into their family. There are cases where these children earn more than their parents. In that case are they matured enough to not to judge their parents and family on the basis of money? No….Probably they are not. Will they think of their parents any more than a “paid” assistant, accompanying them to the shoots? Their siblings, cousins, or friends may not be as lovely and smart as they are. As a result, most of the attention is automatically drawn to these little stars. In a long term prospect, are we ready for a biased and ignored childhood of the future of the nation? They might be very talented in other chores of life but their talent has been outshined by their own sibling, or cousin, or friend.

According to child psychiatrists, when a child is not given an exact exposure and attention then he may get affected by various personality related syndromes. Attention disorders, feeling of insecurity and fear, aggressiveness, are among those various critical disorders; which are being fostered in their personality knowingly or unknowingly or may be, sometimes, due to their unfavourable family circumstances.

I do not find myself matured enough to suggest a solution to this issue as a closing statement. But I am highly influenced with the idea of a health drink commercial in which the mother prepares her child to win and at the same time to lose with pride.

“इतना दर्द क्यों सहते हो?

क्या तुम सोच रहे हो कि लोग क्या कहेंगे?

कोई कुछ नहीं कहेगा|

और फिर हर बार जीतना ज़रूरी नहीं है|

वैसे भी तुम तो हमेशा मेरे नंबर 1 रहोगे|”

“Why do you suffer so much of pain?

Are you thinking about what others will say?

Nobody will say anything.

And, it’s not necessary to win every time.

In any case, you will always be my number one.

On that note, let’s pledge, “If we cannot repair the past; let’s make a fresh beginning.”

I wish if I could..!!!

Tears rolled out of my eyes when the girlfriend of the protagonist died. The novel ended with a sad note and I slept with a heavy heart.

I woke up with a deafening noise of people crying for help and suddenly a big chunk of concrete fell over me from the ceiling. I was in pain. I was negotiating with the almighty for saving me in an exchange of all the good things I have ever done. Everybody else must also be doing the same; but our prayers were not listened anymore. The building collapsed and in no time we were a part of the wreck around. The sight of reptiles and insects intruding human territory increased fright and numbness.

I was suffocating and losing senses. A slideshow of past, good and bad times, struggle and happiness surged in. I was dying. Everybody was dying. All the money and comfort was scattered around me but proved meaningless at that very moment. “Paths of Glory but Lead to The Grave”….so true.

A faded spot of light was getting closer and clearer. It was a new world. Flawless in all means. It was neither heaven nor hell. It was a world of realization of our own acts. A huge screen was showing the images of destruction. Mother Earth was dying a dreadful death along with her children. An unfortunate mother; who could no longer stand the stabs from her own children.

I looked around and analyzed that place. I was awestruck. It has out casted every definition of beauty. The place looked similar to the description of what Earth looked like a millions years ago. I saw strange extinct animals and plants around in their full bloom. Seeing that, I forgot every luxury I was used to have. The sorrow of death also vanished as soon as I found my dear and near ones there; having dead in the same way or other. We chatted and shared our experiences of death. We were amazed to see how men and animals can share the same space without harming each other. Beautiful birds, exotic fruits, colorful flowers, cool breeze, crystal clear rivers, blue sky and a warm friendly Sun. Everything was perfect. We sang and danced and ran around in a trance of joy.

Suddenly, a stentorian announcement filled the air. “This place will be replaced with Earth. The only condition to live here is that people have to survive through some simulations”. “Few simulations for being in such a great place till eternity was not at all a bad game”, I thought to myself and followed the crowd.

My heart, which was pounding with excitement a moment later has now, sank of fright after seeing that filthy sight. We had to survive through all that we have done with the plants and animals on Earth. It was a deep circular enclosure without any windows. The roof was exposed to the enormous Sun vomiting out hot dry ultraviolet rays, smoke grey colored air was full of poisonous pollutants, the soil beneath had not an inch worth standing upon; it was soaked with industry wastes and covered with plastic bags, pale gray stinking water bodies, dried up trees, rotten animals, blood dripping furs were scattered everywhere on it, and the worst of all was the burning temperature of 65 degrees, minimum. Who knows if it had radioactive elements also hidden somewhere.

What? I mean how a person can survive here without fresh air and clean water? It is impossible. But the next moment my wits were defeated by the thought of a new Earth as a reward of this suffering. Everybody gave up with the same desire. Finally we all were stuffed in that enclosed area. By time, suffocation and heat increased and soon it was getting unbearable. People started killing each other to have an extra share of oxygen. Killing a few aided for some time but within an hour more than half people died due to heat and scarce air. The sight was awful. Soon enough there was no sign of life. They failed to survive in their own world of luxuries they made for themselves. Not a single animal of the species of Homo sapiens was left in that enclosure.

It was, indeed, a new Earth outside. The most beautiful ever; but without a trace of humans. I wish we all could live it once. I wish at least I could……

Me, as a 'Libran'.....

Friends….Do you know me?

What is my name?
My name is Rimzim Anand.

What is my Date of Birth? Come on atleast my facebook friends should know it…?

No..? OK…. J Its 22^nd October….. mmm…. year is a well kept secret, so let it be.

It concludes that I am a Libran. I read somewhere that “Librans are great lovers of beauty, grace and harmony. They strive for justice and are always weighing all sides of problem.” Lets see how….

Librans can talk your ear off, yet they are wonderfully flattering good listeners when you need an audience. Did I say Talkative? Well… I am a bit shy and talk only when I am happy, only when I am hurt, only when I am puzzled, only when I am excited… and definitely when I am pulling someone’s leg. I love to describe things with a “personal touch”. When it comes to listening I am sometimes like a confession box where you can dump your deepest secrets and be assured that they will never come out because Librans are super trustworthy and honest.

Though Grey color is the symbol of disruption and uneasiness; and I personally don’t like this color but Librans have a surplus amount of grey matter when it comes to intelligence. Librans have an amazing power of analysis for solving serious problems, and to concentrate on deep subjects. Be it any subject, give them a slightest possibility to debate and they will show their wits. For me, experimentation and innovation must be integral in my life and ways; once lost, I don’t find it attractive anymore.

Librans are peacemakers. They have the ability to smooth everyone’s ruffled feathers around. Librans are good natured and pleasant. A calm smile is the signature expression of most of the Librans. Librans hate to be rude, show-offs, and impatient. They never behave unjustified. For me, if I am happy, others should get an ample share of it; but if I am low, there is no fault of them to suffer whatever they are not intended for.

The Libra bird needs lots of fine feathers for her luxurious nest. A Libran is a lover of all that's good and clean and lovely. My room, wardrobe and workspace at NMX show my interest. Librans love good food, colors, soft light, smooth music, interesting conversation, energetic and expressive people (the reason I am here in toastmasters club). Being a lady, it has extended to matching eyeliners and lip glosses and more than three dozen nail paints arranged neatly according to their shades. No matter how bad or busy the day is, I never forget to flaunt a matching watch from among nearly a dozen of them. Recently bought my 10^th one…But…Librans are never show-offs J

Similar to most Librans, the smell of a book is the scent of calmness for me. Love for nature and animals, photography, travelling, handicrafts, cooking, etc. is an exhaustive list of my stress busters and interests that keep me multitasking.

When it comes to work, Librans strike a perfect balance by being equally hard working and lazy. For days, weeks or months, Librans can be too busy to play. Suddenly, they'll plop down into a chair doing nothing, for may be a long time and again indulge in work with a great vigor, keeping a miraculous balance. It annoy me very much when I see a deadline is reaching and still I am not able to convince myself to work; but at the end everything falls into place and I promise to myself to not repeat it again. But that day is yet to come… J

Libran can weep with overflowing sentiments, turns sharply sarcastic, and then be as bright and cheerful as the first robin in spring. Yes…though they seem very calm and composed but a balancing scale in their mind keeps on struggling for equilibrium to make every thing around “perfect”. The qualities of balanced, harmonious judgment, makes a Libran excellent strategist. Impatience is one quality most Librans can't stand. Librans need harmony everywhere the reason behind; they can not work or live alone.

I feel proud that I am “Justifying” these lovely qualities. Though sometimes I feel that my friends and family are finding me a bit unpredictable but it’s something about that balancing scale I can’t help. J

Think you can, think you can't; either way you'll be right.

Think you can, think you can't; either way you'll be right.  To make it work I have four forces which drive my life: compassion, an urge to survive, unconditional love, and self-belief. Each of them has some dear one associated with it.

First person is my grand-father. He has started his career as a primary school teacher and has retired as the principal of a post graduate college and also the vice-chancellor for sometime. Throughout his life he outlived an example of being compassionate, down-to-earth and realistic. His humbleness and simplicity has always motivated me to learn from him, to be like him. He was always encouraging and used to be very proud whenever I achieved something. Though he is not with me today; but the sight of his elated smile and overjoyed eyes reflecting a pure heart is still fresh in my memories.

Second person is my mother, she is the strength of my life. She has always instilled in me an urge to survive. She has never let me break-down in front of circumstances. I believe that I can never fail until my mother accepts that I am failed. Since childhood, I have a habit to share each and every incident of the day with her; and even today my day do not complete until I talk to her. So, next time when you see me talking over phone, don’t make wild guesses. J

And, now it’s time to make a confession that I am in love since childhood. The love is both sided, grows each day yet purely unconditional. I can not even imagine myself without him. The bonding can not be expressed in words. I just love everything about him. No more wild guesses my friends; He is my Pattu. A lovely parrot with full on attitude. I can spend a whole day talking to him and watching him playing. Be it my cell-phone, laptop, facebook account; his photos are everywhere.

The fourth force driving me is self-belief. I will win is my belief. I love and accept myself the way I am. I believe that a person can achieve everything; unless he comes out from his/her comfort zone. Life is not a fantasy and to deal with it we have to re-energise time to time. For me it’s a long list of hobbies ranging from Photography, cooking, crafts, reading, collecting coins, cosmetics and watches. The busier me is the happier me. I strive to be cheerful and presentable whatever the situation is. Because I know that Think you can, think you can't; either way you'll be right. I surely can. Why not…